Entries to our annual competition for the most creative packaging of a gratuitously boring workplace survey have been prematurely closed following our receipt of a press release from UK workplace consultancy, Croner, claiming that their "Elvis Poll Reveals Employees' 'Suspicious Minds'"
"On the eve of the 30th anniversary of the death of Elvis Presley (16 August), an online poll by workplace experts Croner has revealed that almost a quarter of employees felt they were 'caught in a trap' at work."
You can guess where this is leading, but nevertheless…
"Twenty four per cent of people who responded to a Croner email questionnaire said that the Elvis classic 'Suspicious Minds' was the song that best described their workplace.
They felt that their workplace was dominated by office politics and littered with unsupportive colleagues, many of whom would stab them in the back to advance their own careers or who had received undeserved promotions.
Others (13% of respondents) felt 'All Shook Up' by work because they were too worried or stressed by not being able to keep to deadlines.
When asked about their boss, the poll did show that 13 per cent of employees had a manager who recognised people's skills and took them with them as they move up and on in their own careers - 'Goodluck Charm' was the Elvis song most people felt appropriate here.
However, 11% of respondents were not so complimentary likening their boss to the classic 1970 Number One hit 'The Wonder of You' - somebody who favoured some colleagues over others.
Only 5% of those asked felt their boss had a 'Wooden Heart'."
Apparently there's a serious side to this (sure there is), because "the results serve as a timely reminder that 30 years on from Elvis's death there are still issues in the workplace that employers need to be aware of and deal with."
Well, lets look at some of these for a moment. Work-life balance for one thing. It's a constant refrain of busy executives that work is Always on my Mind when all they really want to think about is the Green Green Grass of Home. Add to that being surrounded by chatter from co-workers when trying to concentrate – what we all need is A Little Less Conversation
But then, try working from home and you soon start missing the water cooler banter –until you get to the point of saying "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry" . . . [stop this right now – ED]